It’s
easy to take the way we communicate for granted because it comes so naturally
to most of us. But seeing and learning different ways, - not just languages but
gestures, manners, and underlying beliefs - can be rewarding and help you make
a good first impression among your friends and colleagues.
Greetings:
·
Handshake
Handare common, but they are friendly,
informal soft but friendly handshakes. A strong handshake isn’t necessary to
assert yourself. Both men and women often greet one another by shaking hands.
When a man meets a woman he usually waits for the woman to offer her hand
first. Women sometimes meet and hug one another when they meet. Men sometimes
pat each other on the back. Men and women shake hands with everyone present at
a business meeting or social occasion and when saying "goodbye."
·
Mano or Amen
Consider
using a "mano” or “amen” greeting with elders. Filipino elders are often
greeted by taking their right hand and bringing it up to touch your forehead.
This is called "mano" or “amen” This is especially important to do
with one’s own family members and with those that are extremely elderly.
·
Touching
When
one places his or her hand on the forehead of another, this is a sign of
respect. But as a rule, touching, especially men touching women, is not well
regarded by Filipinos. Carefully observe the degree of comfort and sense of
space. Filipinos tend to need a wider personal space.
·
Kissing or beso-beso
The
customary kissing or beso - beso as a greeting is inappropriate, as are pats on
the back and touching the shoulder until you’ve developed a personal
relationship. Though you can observe it between women in some circles. Between
men and women, this has been adopted over time but beso-beso between men in the
Philippines is a no-no.
Communications,
Gestures, Body Language
·
Conversation on the first Meeting
Keep
the conversation light and friendly. As with many people all over the world,
Filipinos don't necessarily want to talk about politics or serious topics with
strangers. Instead, focus your conversations on the joys of life: family, food,
and fun. This will make getting to know this new person more enjoyable. In
general, Filipinos love to laugh. They do it genuinely, but they also laugh to
move away from uncomfortable topics or to break tension. Be aware of this and
be willing to change the subject if you notice this cue
When
meeting a Filipino for the first time, and you want to make a good impression,
maintain a low profile, be friendly without being "artificial" and
show a genuine interest in the culture.
·
Giving Direction, Body Language Indicators
Filipinos
use a lot of non-verbal communication. Some examples are raising eyebrows or
lifting the head upwards slightly to indicate "yes" or to greet
friends. It is considered impolite to pass between people conversing or facing
one another. If you must do so, the Filipino polite way is to extend an arm or
two arms with the hands clasped and pointing downwards. Some gestures that are
considered rude are middle finger erect, waving a pointed index finger and
pointing at someone.
If
Filipinos don't understand a question,
o
They open their mouths.
o
Raised eyebrows signify recognition and
agreement.
o
Laughter may convey pleasure or embarrassment;
it is commonly used to relieve tension.
o
"Yes" is signified by a jerk of the
head upward. "No" is signified by a jerk of the head down. Since the
Filipinos rarely say no, the non-verbal sign for "no" is sometimes
accompanied by a verbal yes, which would still indicate "no."
Standing
with your hands on your hips means you are angry.
Touch
someone's elbow lightly to attract attention. Do not tap on the shoulder.
Eye contact:
Eye
contact is important, especially professionally. It is a good sign of
self-confidence. But if a person refuses to or is reluctant to make eye
contact, don’t think of the person as rude. It is merely a sign that the person
you’re talking to has a certain level of shyness.
o
Staring is considered rude and could be
misinterpreted as a challenge, but Filipinos may stare or even touch
foreigners, especially in areas where foreigners are rarely seen.
o
A quick lifting of eyebrows is a Filipino
greeting.
Hygiene
Being
in a tropical country plus the variety of food we eat, body odor is prominent. Due
to high humidity, we always perspire and emit our body scents. However, this is
one of the major consideration that we should not take for granted especially when
we do work in the community. Filipinos are not direct to tell people directly and
usually we do this in a form of jokes. We must take the following
considerations.
·
Filipinos take a bucket shower every day, some
twice a day or will take a half bath especially in the evening before retiring
to bed.
·
Deodorant is a must, or use an alum “tawas” that
is easily find in the market
·
Change clothes everyday especially the t-shirts
or polo before going to work.
Usually Filipinos
have a “pambahay” clothes that we comfortable wear at home and clothes for work
or going to church.
·
In most cases especially in the rural areas
where toilet papers are absent, we wash our bum after defecating which is very
strange especially people coming from the west.
Home
Customs in the Philippines
Filipinos
are very hospitable. They often invite foreigners to their house for meal or
put them up for the night. House guests are sometimes offered the master
bedroom. Depending on the occasion, people offer gifts like flowers, cakes or
fruit or designer products. Gifts are usually opened in front of the giver.
People often send a thank you notes or a small gift after being invited to
dinner, a social gathering or being a house guest.
o
In rural areas people tend to remove their
shoes when entering a home; in urban areas they keep them on. Upon entering a
Filipino's home, one must remove one’s shoes, and should put on slippers or tsinelas.
o
Once inside the home, do not wander around,
unless you are invited to do so: much of the house is off-limits to guests. If
you move from room to room at someone's home, be sure to always allow the more
senior members of your party to enter the room ahead of you.
Eating
Customs in the Philippines
Meals
are regarded as a social experience. There is often a lot of food and a lot of
talking. Guests are expected to eat a lot. If one eats heartily it is regarded
as a compliment. If one doesn’t eat so much it is considered an insult. When
something is offered, Filipinos usually refuse the first time and accept the
second time.
o
Table knives are not used. Forks and spoons are
used for dining. The food is eaten from a spoon. Many Filipinos eat with fork
in the left hand and a spoon in their right hand and push food onto the back of
the spoon with the fork. People often eat with their hands, even rice and
stews. The traditional method of placing food on a banana leaf and eating with
one's hands is also used throughout the country. It is acceptable to eat food
with one's hands at restaurants as well as in the home.
o
Forks, spoons, and knives are used with
Philippine and Western food. In some Philippine restaurants (the more authentic
and usually downscale places), no utensils at all are used. Avoid using your
left hand for any kind of eating, especially if you are eating directly with
your hands and not using utensils.
o
They also often eat an afternoon snack merienda. On the street food is often
served on a banana leaf and drinks in a plastic bag with a straw.
Eating
Habits in the Philippines
A typical Filipino meal consists of a main
seafood or meat dish served with soup, vegetables and rice, with tea or coffee.
Chicken often has bones in it. Fish often come with the heads attached. In much
of the Philippines breakfast, lunch and dinner are same: Filipino-style rice
with some pieces of meat and vegetables in it.
o
Filipinos tend to rise early, and breakfast is
usually eaten between 6:30am and 8:00am. Merienda is the name of a midmorning
and afternoon snack was traditionally served around 10:00 am and at 3:00pm
after a siesta. Filipinos are fond of sweet foods, a mixture of instant coffee,
evaporated milk, and sugar may be served. Coca-Cola is very popular. Sweet
rolls, doughnuts, or a noodle dish may be available.
o
Lunch is traditionally the main meal of the
day, and even today, in busy cities, it can still be an elaborate affair with
several courses-or it can be a simple noodle dish or fast food bolted down in a
matter of minutes. Lunch can also be a light meal with rice and one other dish,
often a fish or meat stew. Lunch is served from about 12:00noon to 1:00pm
o
Dinner is served from 6:00pm on, with 7:30pm
the customary late time and is usually a fish or seafood dish served with rice
and a vegetable dish. Even if the main meal of the day was lunch, dinner is
only slightly lighter-this is often the case with families at home. The dinner
menu is often like that of the more formal lunch.
Drinking
Customs in the Philippines
The
drinking age is 21. People who drink too much are regarded as greedy. Women
often don't drink. What to do if you don't drink alcohol? This is usually not a
problem, since not everyone does, and fruit juices and soft drinks are very
popular.
Business
Meeting & Management Advice
Power
distance is apparent in Philippine culture. This means that subordinate
employees generally accept the hierarchy in companies and have no qualms about
being told what to do by their superiors. They will often refer to their
higher-ups as “Sir” or “Ma’am”, as opposed to being on a first-name basis.
Employees of more prominent multinational companies will try to observe a more
Western, egalitarian culture. However, do not be surprised if you are still
addressed as such out of habit and as a form of respect.
o
Despite the power distance, managers or bosses
are still expected to have a level of cordiality in their dealings. Because
Filipinos value interpersonal relationships, they will respond well to positive
reinforcement whether verbally or through simple pats on the back. On the other
hand, a manager who is too socially detached from his or her team may have
trouble getting its full cooperation.
o
As mentioned earlier, food is a huge part of
Filipino culture and socialization, so expect business meetings to be conducted
over lunch, afternoon snack known as “merienda”, or dinner. When it comes to
meetings, the one who initiated or invited is usually expected to foot the
bill.
o
Another word of warning for management and organizational
development – Filipinos generally find constructive criticism hard to swallow.
What may be an effort to give performance evaluation and feedback to improve
performance may backfire, as Filipinos are conscious of losing face, especially
in front of their peers, colleagues, or superiors. This brings us back to the
concept of “hiya” as mentioned earlier.
o
At the end of the day, it is best to keep in
mind that Filipinos are very social. You will be able to build a professional
relationship founded on trust if you show genuine interest in your business
partner, colleagues, or employees as a person and not merely resources of the
company they represent or belong to.
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